Recently this newspaper ran an article written by a supposed “expert” fashion reporter claiming that Goth was over… This could not be further from the truth.
This article went on to say that the foolish actions of one terran man could influence a fashion movement that has existed for decades (if not centuries). I assure you dear readers, that no man, terran or otherwise, could ever sway the hordes of independent women, men, and others in the Goth Baddie community.
Now you may be asking yourself, what is a Goth Baddie? If you have not experienced one yourself, I must offer you my sincerest apologies. A Goth Baddie represents everything that is right and beautiful about this world. It’s a celebration of the weird and frightening. It’s taking the parts of life most people turn away from and instead looking it straight in the eyes and asking if it wants to go home with you tonight. Goth Baddies can come in all forms, and each one is beautiful and precious. Some view themselves as a representation of the Stranger, others dedicate themselves to Darkness, and there are Goth Baddies that choose their look purely to reflect the shadows and gloom within themselves.
Goth Baddies contribute much to society. Some of the best poetry and music has been created by these depressed hotties. People even say that the renowned playwright Billy Waggledagger went through a Goth Baddie phase while writing his famous play MacDeath. Many great works of art have been created by Goth Baddies, the likes of which can be appreciated in various museums and temples throughout Illumina. Not to mention, Goth Baddies themselves are works of art, brightening our days with their darkness.
Goth Baddies truly are eternal. Their existence will never go away, as they play a vital part in the social ecosystem. Illumina would be a wasteland without these gorgeous emo freaks. I suggest to all that you pray to the Sept (or your preferred god) to send you a Goth Baddie to help you through these dark times.
(Any Goth Baddies reading this - feel free to message me via courier. PLEASE.)